Najvyššia váha:57kg Najnižšia váha: 40kg Výška: 165cm

Září 2016

Som tu..opäť s vami

29. září 2016 v 19:54 | Kimi |  My fairytale
Takže...som tu. Začiatky budú ťažké, ale viem že to zvládnem. Schudla som na 42kg. Pri poslednom článku ktorý som zverejnila som mala 48kg. Ani neviem čo chcem dosiahnuť. Asi len mať rada seba a svoj život taký aký je.
Stratila som každého. Úplne. Každý sa postavil proti mne. Doslovne...nemám nikoho. A teraz, keď som si už začínala zvykať na ten zožierajúci pocit samoty, je tu on. Teraz, keď už som sa dostala na bod, že nikoho nepotrebujem.
Chcem schudnúť na 38kg a potom si váhu už len udržať. Posledné mesiace,...žijem akýsi obyčajný teenagerský život. Aspoň taký, aký som si ho predstavovala. A to je fajn...myslím.
Napíšte kto chcete spriateliť :)
Instagram: crazy.unicorn.metal

Btw. toto som písala...neskutočne dlho..a síce je to v angličtine..ale prekladač existuje (ah viem že nemám dokonalú anglinu ale dá sa to prekusnúť). Veľa mi to pomohlo keď mi bolo najhoršie...takže....tuto to je :)


Peace of mind
Recovery is possible only if you help yourself. On your own. Do not wait for others to save you. Save yourself. Be your own hero. Do not want someone else make you happy, because you will be always sad. Make yourself happy. Do not let your happiness depend on anyone. It does not mean you are lonely when you are alone. Spend some time alone. And remember, losing someone who does not respect and appreciate you is actually a gain, not a loss. Stay away from people who make you feel like you are hard to love. Sometimes you just have distance yourself from people, and believe me, if they care, they will notice and come back. Do not leave yourself to find someone else. Sometimes you need to burn bridges to stop yourself from crossing them again. Live without them, no one will ever miss you. I always wanted someone to save me, but I was always just more and more broken than ever before. And no one cared, so I just gave up on everyone.
I felt always weird and I never knew what is wrong, I though that I need their help, but I found out that I just need to love myself as I am although it is the hardest thing I ever tried. The hardest is to kill the monster inside you without killing yourself in the process.
People leave, even if they promised a million times they will not. Every single person I cared about cared always about someone else more and everyone got tired of me at some point. They all leave. all you have is yourself.
Do not forget, mental illness is not a choice, but recovery is. I know I will relapse and that is ok as long as I keep fighting. Accept yourself as you are. I understood myself only after I destroyed myself. And only in the process of fixing myself did I know who I really was.
I am not living my dream life, no one is. However, now I know that I am definetely on my way to live it.
I have lost everyone, but found myself.
And it was worth it